May 31st, 2008

Ego trippin'

"Dude, wattafark??"

My friend was going to tell me what I should be doing again.

I wouldn't listen. I knew what to do. I could handle this. I knew better than him, right?

At least that is what I told myself.

But then I floundered. I grasped for straws. Ultimately I failed.

And still I wouldn't listen. How could my knowledge be so wrong?

There had to be an angle I didn't know about. An unforeseen circumstance. An element I did not consider. Random anomalies that peppered the situation. A factor missing from the entire equation.

"Hmm...neu-ku-lear eh?"

Undeterred I trudged on. Learning a little more perhaps but getting nowhere still.

How could I?

In a world of uncertainty where theories could only work in an ideal ceteris paribus situation, what was I to do with my mere book smarts?

Vindicate my friend of course.

For all that I thought I knew, it could not hold even a snuffed candle to his experience and in-built street smarts.

Thus when he spoke, I reluctantly listened. He patiently delivered a volley of logical arguments that finally cut through the fog that was my ego.

He spoke of pragmatism. Of not simply pandering to your ego whilst doing ultimately useless things. Of ignoring that annoying mixture of emotion invoked by ego and doing what worked instead.

After all, emotions are only indicators. They are like the meters on a car's dashboard; telling you how fast or slow you're going in relation to the road. They don't by themselves drive the car that is your life.

You do.

Ancient conversation. But still definitely going into my Top-10 Palavers list, if such awards were to be handed out.

Have I ever caught myself reacting to my ego or emotions again? Of course. But only rarely.

And each time I do, I can clearly hear him say

"Dude, wattafark??"